Quots of today!

At work, while folding sheets...

Malin: Fuck I have to take a shit!
Maxime: Yeah me too, I've been walking around farting all day today... You know these quiet, wet farts...
Malin: Oh, the ones who really stink like shit?
Maxime: Yes! What, haven't you felt anything smelly while working today?
Malin: No... But it always smells kinda funky around here, don't you think?


During a break, in the middle of a conversation about relationships:

Maxime: I can't stand this fucking whining, serious, sentimental, romantic bullshit. That has never been my thing.

Sophie Fletcher, Maxime Halfar & Malin Kantorp

New adventures!

Tomorrow me, Malin, Sophie the wife and Roberta (lovely chich from Mexico) are going to a volunteer party in Kibbutz Ramat Hashofet. It's the first time we're going and I hope it's gonna be a kick ass party. We're going to be picked up for free whenever we want, there will be an open bar and open kitchen. Alot of volunteers from other kibbutzim around the north are gonna gather there, so it's a great oppurtunity to meet new people.
I'm excited! The morning after we're probably gonna hitchhike hangover the the beach in Haifa. Malin is probably gonna buy a "day-after-beer" immidiatly when we get there, Roberta's gonna fall asleep, I will jump straight into the water and Sophie is just gonna be boooooooooooooored...

I'll let you know if it turned out how I thought it would.

A couple of volunteers on a volunteer trip to the desert

/Maxime

Kolbo rules man!

What is a Kolbo? I would say it's a small supermarket with expensive food and wierd opening hours. BUT as Malin and me found out a couple of days ago, it's also a fucking clothes store! I mean, we both bought this kick-ass-street-clean-shorts (wearable for all type of occasions) for 10 (TEN) shekels each!
Isn't that wonderful? Well, it made my day.

Maxime Halfar & Malin Kantorp

/Maxime

I'm phat and there's no soloution.

Healthy week made us be even more unhealthy. Started whit beer and icecream...
BUT we played matkot and walked around the kibbutz for a while. We just say it as Agustina (the crazy wonderful girl from Uruguay) ; I'm phaat! But chocolate is the beeeeest thing in the wooorld.

But to day I wont to tell you about the Kolbo, the store of the kibbutz. Every week we get Kolbo-money on our cards. I only buy Pringles, yougurt, bear and Nobless. But in the last days me and Maxime started to explore the Kolbo on our break, the lauondery is next door so we have time. And we find the most clean shorts ever, and for only 10 shekel! From that day is the Kolbo-time a must do, every coffiebreak. But it's not only fun. Because we always have some problem whit the card or someting that make us relly late for work. And when we are out of Kolbo-money in the end of the week... you can imagine.

To day we aloso went to the clinic. Me and Maxime are so oversensitive to mosqitos. The love our blood and our leggs are coverd whit bites and cuts. I have to add that Maxime scratch her legs whit a fork. So, we went to the clinic and they suck, as always. And told us nothing, NOTHING. Like: I know, I lived her all of my life and you just have to stop cratch them. We didn't tell them about the scratch whit a fork. Now we just have to accept that there is no solotion...

















On the way to the pool yesterday we had a languageproblem:

Malin: Hi! (See Shiraz walking thowards)
Shiraz: Manishma? (What's up?)
Sophie: Fitta!! (The only word that she knows in swedish; cunt)
Maxime: O my..

/Malin

A normal day at work

Kevin Harkness

The laundry. In the laundry you can find sheets, alot of sheets, and we have to fold about 100000000000 of them every day. You can also find tables, tables where we just put clothes on for the crazy ladies in the back to fold later. The crazy ladies in the back are... how can I put it... there own species. That's the nice way of putting it though. I would just say they're retarded.

Example:

Yesterday one of the ladies walked around by herself singing "SOS... SOS... SOS". I couldn't help filling in "...a tiger took my family..." and she immediately looked at me, smiled, walked away and kept on going "SOS...SOS!".

Later, one of the other ladies walked around with several small boxes of pills in her hands, she accidently dropped everything on the floor and started to whine and scream "OOOYY OY OOOY AYY AAAY AY!". Me and Malin couldn't help burst out laughing. She looked at us in silence for one second, picked up her pills from the floor and kept on going with her folding like nothing just happened.


Another example is what happended today outside the bomb shelter (see Malins last post). What happened was we started walking out from the laundry with the crazy ladies in the back showing us the way, when we arrived to to the shelter one of the ladies exclaimed "HAHAHHAHA the door is locked and we don't have the key! If this was a real war we would all be dead by now, HAHAHA!!"

What can I say..? Just a normal day at work.

/Maxime

We don't need that bomb shelter anyway so...

Israel prepare them self for attacks, so to day we had to practice by going to a safe place when the siren started. Our bomb shelter was looked so... yes, we are all gonna die. No but serious, Sophie works with the old people and ask her boss where to but them. And she just say: I don't know, maybe in the middle of the room. Like the most dangerous place..

I'm confused. Because I read in a Swedish newspaper that Israel is attacking Iran, and that's the reason for all this preparing? So weird, no one here seems to know anything about it. We just have to wait and see. But we are in one of the most safe places in this country right now. That fells so good. I don't wanna live i Jerusalem right now, for sure.

/Malin

The happy marriage

Yesterday, sunday, we had Sunday Pub Pool Club at the pool (obviously) and husband and wife were acting really sweet to each other. Even though romours of cheating are in the air, the couple are planning to have a romantic night together in a couple of days. Me, the maid of honor, is still trying hard to keep the couple from having a divorce. Maybe we should start with couples therapy once a week or so? With me as the therapist of course. They have to learn how to trust each other, and stop assuming that the other is cheating all the time. That's our biggest problem in the relationship right now.

What I like the most about these two soulmates is the cute nicknames. Malin keeps calling Sophie "honey" after every fucking thing she says, and Sophie has given Malin the new name "handsome". To be continued...

/Maxime